Saturday, November 22, 2008

Laughter is the best medicine..

* Tawanan na lang natin ang problema. Wala naman kasi mangyayari kung magmumukmok lang tayo. 

* I got this post from Patrixia. :)

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true? 

A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap. 

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more 
fruits and vegetables

A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green 
leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products. 

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake? 

A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up! 

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio? 

A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc. 

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program? 

A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good! 

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you? 

A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! .... Foods are fried these days invegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you? 

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle? 

A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach. 

Q: Is chocolate bad for me? 

A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!
 (there's actually some truth to this)

Q: Is swimming good for your figure? 

'If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle? 

A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape! 

Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets. 

And remember: 
'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - 
Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO, What a Ride' 


For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies. 

1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer 
heart attacks than Americans.

2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans..

3. The Chinese drink very little 
red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 

Eat and drink what you like.
Speaking English is apparently what kills you. 



I guess I got it wrong. 
We don't have to stop communicating after all.
Thank, God.
It's better this way.
I don't care if he doesn't feel the same way about me as I do about him.
What matters is that he's there.
I still have my friend.
It's all that matters.

My head hurts.

My eyes hurt. 

My brain is pounding.

My heart is racing.

I feel cold.

I can't breathe.

Everything hurts.

I can't really give a detailed description of everything that happened last night because, well, that's between him and me. And besides, someone might accidentally come across this blog. She'll probably kill me if she finds out.

I hate goodbyes.

Just when I was getting attached to a person, things take a turn for the worst and we have to stop communicating. The world sucks that way. 

I thought I had gained a better outlook on these kinds of things. I thought I was way past all this. But, here I am, hurt. Again. 

I am alone and I am scared. 

I am scared for him, too. Now that I'm not allowed to talk to him anymore, who's gonna cheer him up when he's sad about her? Who's gonna be his clown? 

I have some major readjustments to make.

For the past three weeks or so, the high point of my day was talking to him. He made me happy. He made me forget all my problems. I hope I did the same thing for him as well.

I am gonna miss him so much.

He has been a very good friend to me and that's not something that I am bound to forget anytime soon.

I feel so helpless right now. 

Everything sucks and there's nothing I can do about it but accept it.

Right now, the future looks a little bleak to me. Then again, maybe that's because my eyes are clouded with so much tears. 

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Someday, my prince will come..

PDA: Public Display of Affection. We all know what this is, right?

PDA-ing couples are the bane of a single person's existence. I guess we're just bitter or whatever but when we see lovey-dovey couples doing mushy gushy stuff to each other, it makes us wanna gag. Which is, you know, terribly hypocritical since we ourselves used to be part of the Public Display of Physical Intimacy club. I guess we just can't bear the sight of happy couples when we're not as blissful as they are. In other words, we envy them. 

I mean, seriously, what did I miss? How can they have that kind of relationship when I can't? How are they making it work? All these questions pop into a singleton's mind when he/she sees couples looking goo goo eyes at each other. 

I got the inspiration to write this particular blog when I was watching the new Cinderella movie on the Disney Channel. They said a lot of things about loving a person for what he/she really is. Accepting someone despite all the flaws and imperfections, and that kind of stuff.. And that got me thinking.. 

What am I? 

This is not something that I am proud of but I have had two failed relationships in the span of just two years.

What went wrong?

Is it my fault?

Or theirs?

Do I turn into some kind of horrible monster when I fall in love?  

And so begins the long-winded rant.

What kind of person do I become when I fall in love?

These are all very mind-boggling questions and just the thought of them makes my head pound so I'm not even gonna attempt to try and answer them.

I realize that this is a very messy blog. My thoughts are incoherent and keep jumping from one point to another.

The short and short of it is..

I have got no point.

The intro is totally unrelated to the conclusion.

But whatever.

This is a free country.

I can write what I want when I want.


Where was I before I so rudely interrupted myself?

Oh, yeah.


I look around me and I see all these happy couples. I used to be one of them and someday, I am hoping to become one of them again. Happy. And in love. Recently, I just made the decision to let go of a person whom I have loved for the longest time and I think it was one of the best things that I have done recently because it has been healthier for me. Emotionally, at least. But, alas, I have no more outlet for my feelings which is why it's all been backfiring and making me a little berserk. But still. I think I'm better now. 

I am the kind of person who loves with all her heart. I think this is what freaked my exes out. I expressed it too much. Or whatever. But isn't that the whole point of loving? Dedicating time and effort to the person who has your heart just to show them how much you love them? I understand that we each have our separate lives but shouldn't a substantial part of this be spent with the object of your affections? That's how I am. I love with all my heart. It's all I know. I never have and never will take anyone for granted. Pag nagmahal ako, isa sha sa mga priority sa buhay ko. Pag nagmahal ako, ipapakita ko talaga sa kanya na importante sha sakin. Pag nagmahal ako, hindi ko sha sasaktan. Pag nagmahal ako, gusto ko lagi shang masaya. Pag, nagmahal ako, totoo. Ayoko ng iwanan. Ayoko ng lokohan.

Is it too much to ask for a guy who would love me the exact same way that I love him? Who would show me the exact same care as I do for him? All I want is someone who will give me a hug when I need one. Someone who will never make me feel that I am worthless. Someone who will not care about distances. Someone who can make me laugh even when the whole world is falling into pieces all around me. Someone who will love me for me despite my imperfections, occasional weirdness, and over-all quirkiness. Someone who will give me flowers for no apparent reason. Someone who will tell me that he loves me just because he wants me to know. Someone who will not get irritated when I'm extra kulit. Someone who wouldn't mind that I'm selosa and who is a little seloso himself. Someone who is a little possessive. Someone who will laugh at my corny jokes. Someone God-fearing. Someone who will be afraid to lose me. Someone who will mean it when he says he will never break my heart. 

We all want the same thing, right? The right person. The right moment. I want to be optimistic and believe that someday, everything will fall into place and I will finally be genuinely, truly, happy.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Next mood swing in five minutes...

I'm so weird. 

Di naman dapat problemahin pero lagi ko iniisip.


I gotta distract myself.




Kahit ano.

I gotta stop this before it gets worse.

I so know myself.

Crap. Crap. Crap. 

I can't go back to sleep..

I slept at 1am. exactly 1am. I remember because I was waiting for a friend of mine to log in on ym and decided to give up at around that time 'cause I thought he was asleep already. Anyhoo, I woke up at 4am and couldn't go back to sleep. Grrr. 

Maybe because I'm too hyped up. 

I couldn't really say too much here but I am happy. 


Thank God. ^^,

Friday, November 14, 2008



This is exactly what I don't want this blog to sound like but, what with the topic that I have in mind, I guess it's inevitable. Not that a lot of people keep track of the goings on in my life, but for those who do, this shouldn't be too hard to follow. It's a long story and I don't want to go into the whole thing anymore. Just the summary. Bits and pieces that have had a very big impact in my life..

The Incident.

I saw him last Saturday. As usual, just the mere sight of him made my heart skip a few beats. It's pathetic that, after all this time, he still has the same effect on me while I have no effect on him whatsoever anymore. The whole time I was with him, I kept thinking, "Crap, I still love him so much." Everytime our hands would accidentally touch, I would secretly wish that I still had the right to hold his hand. Everytime he and I got close to each other, I would want to reach out and hug him. It killed me that I couldn't. 

The Clues.

Seeing him last Saturday was one of the best moments of my 2008. But it was also one of the worst. It hurts when the person that you love doesn't belong to you anymore. It hurts like hell, I can't even begin to describe it. The worst part was, when he was asking me if he should break up with her. I tried to be as objective as I possibly could because all that matters to me is that he is happy. I don't really care if it kills me. When you really, truly love someone the way I love him, you just want what's best for that person. 

We said goodbye at the MRT Cubao station. Just like old times. The difference is, when I looked back after we said goodbye, I couldn't see him anymore. He just disappeared in the crowd. Maybe it was an omen.

The Epiphany.

He has broken up with her. And I could see how much it's hurting him.  I wonder if he felt the same when he and I broke up. Probably not. It saddens me to think of this but I can't help it. It's what I see. I can see how much he loves her. And it kills me. Again. And again. And again. 

I'm tired of dying. 

I want to let go. 

To finally let go.

After two gruesome years.

It's about time. 

The Conclusion.

Once upon a time, I loved a boy. He told me he loved me too. He told me there would come a time when we would have our second chance but I don't think this is ever gonna happen because he never really loved me as much as he loved her. Nafefeel ko, in the end, sila pa rin magkakabalikan. Masakit lang kasi, bakit nung sakin, wala naman ganung effort? I never took him for granted and I never hurt him as much as she did, pero bakit ganun? Kung sino pa yung nakakasakit sa 'yo, yun pa rin ang mahal mo? Ang weird talaga ng buhay. 

Sabi ko sa kanya dati, one day I would wake up and realize that I don't have feelings for him anymore. 

I think that day is getting nearer and nearer kasi ayoko na ng ganito. Nagpapakaloser lang ako dahil umaasa ako sa wala. Oo na, tanga na ko, kasi ngayon ko lang inamin sa sarili ko yun. Ngayon ko lang tinanggap. Everyone has their limit. I think I'm about to reach mine. 

I am giving up on you.

When I would look at him when I thought he wouldn't notice, I would see the boy that I fell in love with two years ago. When I look at him, I see the boy that changed my perspective on life. I would see the boy who used to make me feel special and loved and cared for. But I would also see the boy who broke my heart.