Saturday, November 22, 2008


My head hurts.

My eyes hurt. 

My brain is pounding.

My heart is racing.

I feel cold.

I can't breathe.

Everything hurts.

I can't really give a detailed description of everything that happened last night because, well, that's between him and me. And besides, someone might accidentally come across this blog. She'll probably kill me if she finds out.

I hate goodbyes.

Just when I was getting attached to a person, things take a turn for the worst and we have to stop communicating. The world sucks that way. 

I thought I had gained a better outlook on these kinds of things. I thought I was way past all this. But, here I am, hurt. Again. 

I am alone and I am scared. 

I am scared for him, too. Now that I'm not allowed to talk to him anymore, who's gonna cheer him up when he's sad about her? Who's gonna be his clown? 

I have some major readjustments to make.

For the past three weeks or so, the high point of my day was talking to him. He made me happy. He made me forget all my problems. I hope I did the same thing for him as well.

I am gonna miss him so much.

He has been a very good friend to me and that's not something that I am bound to forget anytime soon.

I feel so helpless right now. 

Everything sucks and there's nothing I can do about it but accept it.

Right now, the future looks a little bleak to me. Then again, maybe that's because my eyes are clouded with so much tears. 

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